Loki_Six

"Okay, let's see. He's a sweet, honest, fun-loving, decent guy, and you are a shallow stuck-up snob. Yeah, I agree. He's not right for you."

"Cool. Whoa. The ability to see the future. What an awesome responsibility. Heavy is the head that wears the cheese."

"If you're going to read, I'm going to read too, where's my Garfield book?"

"Ah, yes, two more graduates of the Ace Ventura Charm School."

"All I can say, Dad, is if you watch Baywatch with your wife, you know nothing about marriage."

"So what's with the long face, man? You look like you're dragging lower than Bill Clinton's butt after a trip to McDonald's, man."

"I know a good job when I see one."

"I really gotta get out of this family."

"He's a living creature. He is a disease-infested rodent, honey. If he could, he'd kill us, and then invite his friends over to eat our faces, okay?"

It was the night before Christmas and all through the van... Not a creature was stirring, not even Code-man. The stocking was hung, it was nailed to the roof. No one heard when I did it 'cause my van is soundproof. I got in my water bed and thought, "Hey, what would be neater than if Santa would bring me a water bed heater." I had started to doze, when I heard such a clatter. I bolted straight up, smashed my head on a ladder. I looked out the window, I said, "Code-man, no way." It was a tiny reindeer, pulling this fat dude on a sleigh. He had one final message before he flew out of sight. "Have a Merry Christmas, dudes. And to all, a good night."